Hi, which API or library on which mobile OS is to be used when one needs to write a code to use the phone's IrDA to create the necessary impulses to remote control consumer electronics e.g. a HDD media player?
Is maybe a certain mobile OS better suited for that kind of application than others?
First you need to know that IrDA is not the best choice for remote control. It can be done, but IrDA is by design high speed/low range, you can emulate low speeds but ranges (IMO) are far from practical usage (Nokia e50 is able to control digital camera shutter from 2-3m... with very, very careful aiming). The amount of hacking needed to achieve this is shown here, you basically need to trick IrDA to send correct impulses with correct frequency.
The second thing is that CIR remote control is not as simple as you might think. There are countless standards that differ in used frequency, modulation, wavelength, command codes and so on. You need to know what you want to support. LIRC site can be very helpful in determining that http://lirc.sourceforge.net/remotes/. Approachable explanation of what it all means is available here: http://www.sbprojects.com/knowledge/ir/ir.htm
As for ready made libraries and platforms... I honestly don't know. I've seen it done on PocketPC (nevo among others) and Symbian S60 (irRemote). Haven't seen working J2ME app yet.
Last time I needed the IR remote I hacked it together using IR diode, AVR ATTiny and surprisingly short piece of assembly :)