Well,
Neo4j is Open Source. The AGPL is certainly protecting the continuing development of a software by pulling in money from projects that do not openly want to contribute to the project to keep development going. A more reality-adjusted version of GPL2 that has brought up projects like Linux and MySQL. However 1M primitives are free of charge (for your convenience in starting up and beta), and I will send you the pricelist which you will find is not outrageous in its pricing. We are considering putting the prices on the Neo Technology website but have not decided on the best strategy to communicate, sorry for the confusion.
Then, Neo4j has a SPARQL API which avoids vendor lock-in. But sadly, there is absolutely no good declarative graph query abstraction layer that will let you do all the cool graph operations you want to do - especially variable length path calculations like "Find the medium path length between this and some other entity" etc. Once we have something good (hopefully very soon) we will open source it and put the API under a less viral license to foster the whole Graph Database community and avoid vendor lock-in.
We are actively working on such a possibility that will have influences of both SPARQL for describing Graph patterns, XPath for describing traversing patterns, and JavaScript/JSON for providing an easy syntax for expressing complex traversers (currently available in Ruby, Java, Python etc).
Disclaimer: I am part of the Neo Technology team.