I don't think a Chiltons-like reference would really apply to software development, since no two problems are ever the same. There are always a multitude of variables that can affect the estimate.
On the other hand, there are a finite number of types of cars (since they are mass-produced, unlike custom software solutions), and a finite number of components to these cars, so a standard estimate for certain jobs is more applicable.
Estimating development tasks is a skill that can only be honed by experience. You can read about different techniques, and these will certainly help, but at the end of the day, experience is what will help you make accurate estimates.
Edit: Now that I understand your question better, that you want tips on how to make the most of your experience:
This may be difficult to do now, but I would suggest keeping a journal, in as much detail as possible, to keep track of what tasks took how long, and what caused delays, etc. Of course, this is something that you need to do constantly while gaining the experience, so it may not work well as well to look back on your career and try to remember all of the details.