There's no safe way to determine the size of a record that a pointer points to. However, if you allocated the memory that the pointer points to, you can ask the size of that memory block. But then again, since you allocated that block, you should already know the size of that block!
The Delphi memory manager keeps track of every block of memory that gets allocated. With information from the memory manager it is possible to find this information, if your pointer points to the beginning of a memory block. However, if you allocated a large block of memory, loaded some data in it and your pointer points to some data inside this block, this method would be quite unreliable.
Also, if you use referenced types (dynamic arrays, strings, classes, etc.) in your record, the size it returns will still be unusable since you get the size of the reference (4 bytes) instead of the size of the data that is referenced to.
The NEW() command just uses the type information of the datatype that you pass to it to get it's size. To know how it does this exactly, you could just check the Delphi sourcecode. Open \source\Win32\rtl\sys\System.pas and search for "_New". (With the underscore in front of it. Using this sourcecode might help you to understand how Delphi handles memory allocations, although the sourcecode can be really complex.