It is not possible. Apple does not want you to do this.
Now, what you could do is bookmark a javascript bookmarklet that checks the user-agent of the browser invoking it, and if the user is on Safari on their laptop or desktop Mac, then invoke the iCal using standard method (ICS file).
The user on iPhone could bookmark your page into a home screen bookmark with a useful (and perhaps custom) icon that said "Event" and title of "Meet Mary at 8:15". They could then, when they have synced their bookmarks, be reminded of the event and invoke it on their desktop browser.
Significant barriers here to educating users how to use this system, but it would work if you could convince people to do it, I think.