Is it ever OK to go out for lunch and never come back (as a programmer)?

Question

Prompted by the responses to How important is the environment at a job? I thought it worthwhile to pose this question:

Is it ever OK to just walk out the door and never come back? If so, under what circumstances? If not, why not?

I've never done that but I think in the first 2-3 days this isn't that unacceptable. There's no drama, no exit interviews, no meetings, no having someone supervise you while you clear out your desk, all that crap. Obviously send an email at least so they don't think you've been kidnapped.

Thoughts?

Answer 1

No, leaving without saying bye to at least your boss is cowardice.

Answer 2

Most employer's ask for your last employer's details.
No doubt such a poor display would bite you in the end

Answer 3

Then no lunch breaks for you at the next job :)

But seriously , when is just quitting ever a solution?

Answer 4

I've known people do that in the first few days in my (non-programming related) job. On one occasion someone went to lunch on their first day and never came back because the person who was showing him the ropes had bullied him at school. I'd agree that in the first few days that's probably acceptable but it's just basic politeness that you let them know otherwise they might think you'd gone missing or something. Even if you just ring them the next day and say "sorry I really didn't like it there and I won't be back", that's OK. If you've been there years it's a lot less acceptable.

Answer 5

If you have signed a contract you will have some obligations. There may be a question over whether they will enforce it or you will be bound by it, but you almost certainly are not terminating your employment by walking out and not coming back. You will probably find yourself in breach of some portion of the contract and in a bit of trouble. If they have incurred costs in your recruitment they may be well within their rights to claim them back from you if you breach the contract by not showing up.

Best way is to go and see your boss and the person who hired you and arrange your exit peacefully.

Answer 6

Leaving without saying anything is bad. I did it once a long time ago and I still feel terrible about just walking out. For me it had nothing to do with the company. The company I worked for was one of the best employers I've had but I was about to be burned out and did not want to go all the way.

Answer 7

Someone did that at a place I worked at on their first shift. But we packed shelves in a supermarket.

Answer 8

Even if there are no contracts, the other company might get into trouble by employing you when you are still in the rolls of another. So for your own sake, make sure you have a formal exit.

Walk away if you want to, but make sure to send a formal communication that you have resigned.

Answer 9

No it isn't.

I once worked somewhere and knew within 3 days I didn't like it. I spoke to the manager and explained I was taking another job, and why.

He didn't like it, he was quite annoyed. I felt awkward and guilty, but at least I knew I had shown him some respect and at least had the manners to stay and explain my feelings rather than just disappearing like a little boy running away and hiding from my problems.

Answer 10

I would say no.

This is allegedly job related, but I can't think of any meaningful substitute situation that would make it acceptable, either. Walking away without saying anything is for anonymous, low impact situations like deciding that a queue is too long to wait out.

Answer 11

If you leave within the first week, either:

it's not the job they advertised

You are an it10t for taking the job without doing enough due diligence to work out what you were getting into.

I've seen people last 2-3 weeks before leaving. In those cases, I dont think they gave the job enough time before working out it wasn't for them. Obviously, they didn't ask the right questions in the interview (and I was one of the people interviewing them)

All up, I think anything less than 3 months (ideally 6) is a cop-out. But if you are really really unhappy, talk to the manager etc, and work out why the reality is SO different from the advertised job.

I only know of one person who literally walked out of their job. He was a network admin, and installed a product which messed with their Exchange server in a bad way (he altered the default setup against advice). A VERY bad way, like they had to buy the product, or lose all email except the previous 3 months. He literally packed his desk up and walked out, tho I think he left a note for the managers.

We (I was working for the vendor) sorted out the exchange server (and I think they ended up becoming a customer), but I dont know what happened to the admin.....

Answer 12

It's fine, do what you like. They don't own you.

(you may live to regret it though)

Answer 13

Does this question really have to be asked? That's normally a problem with employee retention at McDonald's, not for a well paid IT gig. Have some courtesy and show professionalism no matter how poorly the job fitment is!

Answer 14

Given that I opened this can of worms, I want to state for the record that I did notify my supervisor (as soon as I got home, actually) that I wasn't going to be back; it's not like I up and disappeared and never let them know "Hey, I'm not going to be in to work tomorrow, or ever again".

And for the record, I do think there are situations when the best course of advice is simply to run away screaming - typically involving bait and switch schemes. I admit that in my exact situation I was probably wrong to do it, but I have been in situations where I should have done it and didn't, and ended up suffering more because the job in question was soul-draining.

Answer 15

I think employee response should be proportional to job suckiness. I think in most cases, the job simply cannot suck so much that one would leave without a chat with the boss - mainly because the IT industry is a bit more intellectual than, say, fast food. But, on the other hand, I imagine there are cases where the job is totally not what you expected. Here's an example: you got hired to program in a language like C# but got told that you have to code in [insert obscure language here] for a few months. In other words, when you find out that the employer lied to you or blatantly manipulated you to accept the job, then walking out is perhaps an appropriate response.

There's also something to be said for when explaining yourself is meaningless. For example, imagine that you want to walk out because, say, you're being paid below-market but your bosses think your job rate is perfectly fine. If the possibility of having a meaningful conversation with management is zero, then simply leaving might make sense - whether you're only starting or have worked there for a while.

Answer 16

Burning bridges that you don't really have to burn isn't a very good idea. You never know when you may need to cross them again.

Answer 17

It is acceptable iff you fear for your safety. In which case you should leave and go to the police.

Otherwise, act like a grown-up and give two weeks' notice.

Answer 18

Professionalism is required first and foremost in all we do at the workplace. I was in the same boat as you once and I empathize; its terrible. In my situation I had negotiated a 3 month window where we could feel each other out. I struggled through three months but knew I had a minimum commitment. When I completed it, I setup an exit interview, gave professional explanations to why it wasn't working out and moved on. Dealing with the pains in life is what prepares us for the future. My skin thickened and it prepared me for going independent.

Answer 19

Yes, if you get hit by a bus. Otherwise No.

Answer 20

Yes, it is definitely OK to go out to lunch and never come back in certain circumstances. For example, at any time if you are asked to do anything illegal, on the first day if your co-workers turn out to be abusive, or if you discover that the position is NOT as advertised/contracted/discussed.

Answer 21

I would imagine that there are a few extreme cases where I'd challenge someone wanting to call this unacceptable:

1. Kidnapping, death or hospitalization - In these cases, someone goes out and doesn't come back because of outside forces that stop them. This also would cover cases where someone may go to rehab after an intervention or wants to go off on a reality show or other rare trips or opportunities in one's life.

2. Threats of violence in the workplace - If I seriously thought my boss or a co-worker was about to snap and kill a bunch of people, I may leave and never go back.

3. Inaccessible work place - For example, if the elevators were out and I'd have to walk up many floors, the path the to front door is covered with ice, or driving to the office is unadvisable due to snow drifts, ice, or other poor driving conditions, I think I may not be going back if I went out for lunch or an appointment or whatever.

Under other circumstances, I'd likely discuss that I'm leaving if that is what I've decided so that it isn't a big surprise. I know that once I left a job due to a work visa expiring which was kind of rough as it wasn't like the employer really wanted to get rid of me. In other cases, either I'd left to go to another job or was fired from where I worked.