I would take the VCAM example of a DirectShow capture device (available at:
http://tmhare.mvps.org/downloads/vcam.zip)
This driver appears to the O/S as a video capture device and would run in the destination process. The source would use shared memory buffers to feed it frames to inject.
While more complicated than a minimal shared-memory IPC scheme, it gives an incredible advantage in that your video pipes can connect to most media player programs, capture and editing tools, etc.
I have done this several times, including features like sinks, mixers, Freeframe effect plugins, and so on. It should take a day or two to hack together.