That there is no simple way to read a PNG file into a memory bitmap in native Windows seemed impossible, but after much googling I'm beginning to believe it. The libpng/zlib combination is just too big. Any third-party libraries Win32 libraries out there for reading a PNG?
Edit: The boost::gil::png solution is much more complex than I'd hoped, too. Just need a single call that takes a file name and fills a memory buffer with pixels.