You have to manage the states of your buttons by yourself in this case.
Meaning that you should hold a BOOL member for each button that will state if the button is selected.
Or, if you should have only one selected button in a time, then you might hold a reference to the selected button.
In the tap events you should manage the states above by changing the image of the last selected button to non-selected image and the image of the currently selected button to selected button image.
You can change the image like this:
[button setBackgroundImage:[UIImage imageNamed:@"selected_button.png"] forState:UIControlStateNormal];