I am not sure why this question was down voted. I think it's a great question. It's one thing to google search, and read some random websites which a lot of times are trying to sell you something rather than to be objective. And it's another thing to ask SO crowd which are developers/IT Mangers to share their experiences, and what works or doesn't work for their teams.
Now that this point is out of the way. I am sure a lot of developers will point you towards "Agile" and/or Scrum, keep in mind that these terms are often used very loosely especially Agile. I am probably going to sound very controversial by saying this which is not my intention, but these methodologies are over-hyped, especially Scrum which is more of a product being marketed by Scrum consultants than "real" methodology. Having said that, at the end of a day, you got to use what works the best for you and your team, if it's Agile/Scrum/XP or whatever, go for it. At the same time you need to be flexible about it, don't become religious about any methodology, tool, or technology. If something is not working for you, or you can get more efficient by changing something, go for it.
To be more specific regarding your questions. Here's the basic summary of techniques that have been working for me (a lot of these are common sense):
Organize all the documents, and emails pertaining to a specific project, and make it accessible to others through a central location (I use MS OneNote 2007 and Love it for all my documentation, progess, features, and bug tracking, etc.)
All meetings (which you should try to minimize) should be followed by action items where each item is assigned to a specific person. Any verbal agreement should be put into a written document. All documents added to the project site/repository. (MS OneNote in my case)
Before starting any new development, have a written document of what the system will be capable of doing (and what it wont do). Commit to it, but be flexible to business needs. How detailed the document should be? Detailed enough so that everyone understands what the final system will be capable of.
Schedules are good, but be realistic and honest to yourself and business users. The basic guideline that I use: release quality and usable software that lacks some features, rather than a buggy software with all the features.
Have open lines of communication among your dev. team and between your developers and business groups, but at the end of a day, one person (or a few key people) should be responsible for making key decisions.
Unit test where it makes sense. But DO NOT become obsessive about it. 100% code coverage != no bugs, and software works correctly according to the specs.
Do have code standards, and code reviews. Commit to standards, but if it does not work for some situations allow for flexibility.
Comment your code especially hard to read/understand parts, but don't make it into a novel.
Go back and clean up you code if you already working on that class/method; implementing new feature, working on a bug fix etc. But don't refactor it just for the sake of refactoring, unless you have nothing else to do and you're bored.
And the last and more important item:
Do not become religious about any specific methodology or technology. Borrow the best aspects from each, and find the balance that works for you and your team.