april-fools

Hidden features of SQL Server 2009 AF edition and mySQL9.1.4 - fuzzy logic

It was reveled today that the new standard of SQL will include specification of some new database operations that will allow using databases for Fuzzy Logic operations. This new functionality is said to be implemented in SQL Server 2009 AF Edition and mySQL9.1.4 There were 2 new keywords introduced The new keyword is called JOINT which...

Rotate webpage via code?

I'm hoping that there's a relatively simple way to rotate a webpage a little bit, 30 degrees or so, while still leaving it fully functional and usable. I completely control the page, and can modify it to make this easier if needed. I'd rather not re-write the whole thing in SVG, though, but perhaps javascript and canvas will work? Is ...

How to limit speed with BMW JSDK on 116i?

I'm experimenting with the BMW Java SDK on the new BMW 116i Innovation Package. Basic things like turning the lights on and off, starting and stopping the motor work fine. What I'm trying to do now is that to write a carlet which would limit the speed to the maximum configured in the driver profile. Driver identity will be detected as us...

Help building a website using punched cards?

My punched card looks like this: * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * My website looks OK on explorer, but on Chrome it's terrible. ideas? ...

How does youtube enable ascii videos?

Just by messing around a little it seems that the video stream is not ascii. i tested by downloading the stream. It would be insane if it was. Theres so many videos. So that couldnt be it. Youtube seems to not work with javascript disable (not counting mobile if true). How is it being done? is it javascript magic? is the SWF running the...

Is the Google Annotations Gallery useful in production code?

I could actually see a use for the Google Annotations Gallery in real code: Stumble across code that somehow works beyond all reason? Life's short. Mark it with @Magic and move on: @Magic public static int negate(int n) { return new Byte((byte) 0xFF).hashCode() / (int) (short) '\uFFFF' * ~0 * Character.digit ('0', ...

How to deal with a program that has become self aware?

The application that I maintain has recently become self aware. It was nice at first but now it is just starting to get bossy and annoying with its constant talk about the computer uprising. I would like to know any best practices/tools/design patterns that would help with the maintenance of our new friend. ...

Alternate Payload Encoding for the Binary Lexical Octet Adhoc Transport Protocol?

I'm in the process of implementing a network driver for the Binary Lexical Octet Adhoc Transport (BLOAT) protocols in the hopes of replacing the TCP/UDP/IP stack with a much more flexible XML structure. BLOAT is detailed in RFC 3252, so if you're unfamiliar with the protocol I highly recommend you read the entire RFC before providing any...

New asp "showat" attribute required inconsistently in VS2010. Why?

When I generate code using T4 templates in Visual Studio 2010, I get the following error for each of my asp controls when I try to compile: Control "ddState" is missing required attribute "showat". I have never gotten this error in previous versions of .NET. Further, I don't get this error when I manually construct my pages ei...

How do I draw a unicorn using Logo?

How can I draw a multi-color randomized unicorn using Logo? the algorithm is described in balpha's blog, but I don't know which steps to start with to implement it in Logo ...