What are the worst metaphors in computer science and engineering?

Question

We recently had this question about our favorite metaphors, but in my experience, whether we like them or not, the Computer Science/Engineering field is full of metaphors that range wildly in appropriateness.

For example, although it never bothered me, I had a computer science professor in my undergrad days who hated the word "partition" in reference to hard drives. In his opinion, a "partition" was a fence or divider, but a hard disk partition referred to the actual space between the dividers. Go figure.

Being reminded of the prevalence of metaphors in our field, I wanted to ask the community, what are (in your opinion) some of the worst metaphors in information technology?

Answer 1

It's like... a series of tubes...

Answer 2

The absolute worst metaphor ever from http://www.codinghorror.com/blog/archives/001130.html

Programming is all about knowing when to boil the orange sponge donkey across the phillipines with an orangutang gorilla crossed with a ham sandwich to the fourth power of twelve across the nile with an awful headache from the previous night when all of alfred's naughty jalapeno peppers frog-marched the nordic elves across the loom-lined geronimo induced swamp donkey over and above the fortran fortified kilomanjaro fence past the meticulously crafted anti disgusting sponge cake scenario where all the hats doth quoteth the milk which is not unlike the super werewolf from the infinite realm of ninja-step. it's hard to define, really.

Answer 3

Referring to poorly designed/structured code as a "Code Smell".

I've always disliked that analogy.

Answer 4

The "Save" feature in many applications. I have to agree with Neal Stephenson's statement about this (link). When you "Save" something it should persist, but when you "Save" something in most applications it replaces an existing copy. Most of the time, you aren't going to be able to get back to that previous version at a later time, even though it was "Saved". To truly "Save" something, you'd have use something like Subversion or a much more robust file system.

Answer 5

I've always thought a lot of the Agile stuff had bizarre metaphors. But that's very subjective.

Answer 6

The entire object-oriented metaphor bothers me, though more because it's overused than because it's intrinsically bad. It's definitely useful for some things, but the problem is how many people try to make it fit every problem because it's the only metaphor they know.

Answer 7

I really hate "rules engine".

Real engines have oil and noise and big spinning rods and controlled explosions and all sorts of exciting stuff. Rules engines in software development are always horribly dull in comparison.

Answer 8

Scrumm.

It's just too damn sporty.

Answer 9

Nine engineers can't make a baby in one month.

Answer 10

Inheritance. Its so limiting.

I hate how it gets abused and how it can get awkward sometimes. I would you could expose composition instead of inheritance.

Answer 11

The metaphor that most bugged me is 'dragging a device to the trash' in the MacOS (especially pre-MacOS X) desktop. I don't want to throw it away - I want to unmount it. At least with MacOS X, the process changes the trash into an eject symbol.

Answer 12

The cloud. Mostly because it implies your code will somehow be magically executed by God and his angels instead of a server room somewhere someone is paying very dearly for. Early external 'cloud' backup solutions failed whenever the people hosting the backups simply quit using the utility.

Answer 13

I really really hate the "pattern" metaphor. It encourages the idea that people without actual software development skill can make good software just like someone without any fashion design skill can make good clothing from a sewing pattern.

Answer 14

Comparisons between software and almost any manufacturing industry, especially automotive.

Answer 15

Software engineering is like building a bridge...

Answer 16

IF one more thing is a ninja or pirate I will stab.